When Masculine Protects and Feminine Creates: Returning to Our Dharma in Relationships

There’s something quietly breaking inside many of us.

We love, we try, we give. But something still feels off.
Our relationships feel heavy. Effortful. We find ourselves misunderstanding, pulling away, or just… going through the motions.

Why?

Because somewhere along the way, we stopped honouring our core, our dharma.
We forgot who we are at the deepest level, and began living from roles, patterns, expectations, and wounds.

And when we forget who we are, how can we truly meet another?

Shiva and Shakti are not just deities.
They are energies. Archetypes. Reflections of you and me.
The masculine and feminine forces that exist in all things. In every one of us.

Shiva is consciousness. Intention. The stillness. The structure.
Shakti is energy. Emotion. Creation. The movement. The flow.

One without the other is incomplete.

Let’s make it simple.

To create a child, you need both: Shiva’s seed and Shakti’s womb.
One without the other cannot create life.

But this applies beyond biology.

To start a business?
You need the idea, the spark, the decision to create (Shiva).
But you also need nurturing, patience, development, detail (Shakti).
Without Shakti, the idea dies in the air. Without Shiva, there is nothing to nurture.

To build a home?
You need the foundation, the walls, the safety (Shiva).
But you also need warmth, beauty, care, presence (Shakti).
One creates the shelter. The other makes it home.

In every relationship, too, this dance plays out.

But today, the dance has lost its rhythm.

Men are being told their masculinity is dangerous.
Women are being told their softness is weak.
And both are being pushed into roles that exhaust them.

So the masculine forgets how to protect without controlling.
And the feminine forgets how to create without performing.

But Shiva never controlled Shakti. He revered her.
She was the one who pulled him down from the mountains of Kailash into the rhythm of family.
She birthed Ganesha. She brought love, home, meaning.

And when even Shiva could not defeat a demon, it was Shakti who rose as Durga, as Kali. Fierce. Boundless. The destroyer of darkness, not out of anger, but to protect what is sacred.

This is not about gender roles or patriarchy. This is about energies.
We all carry both within us. But when we suppress one and overplay the other, we create imbalance, not just in ourselves, but in our partnerships.

Have you noticed?
A man who doesn’t feel trusted by his partner slowly becomes quiet, confused, or aggressive.
A woman who doesn’t feel safe or heard slowly becomes cold, anxious, or overly controlling.

Why?

Because they are not living from their center.

Shiva needs to be received. His direction, his vision, needs to be met with faith, with presence.
Shakti needs to be honored. Her intuition, her emotion, needs to be held with steadiness, not dismissed.

When the masculine protects, the feminine opens.
When the feminine flows, the masculine rises.

It is not submission.
It is not hierarchy.
It is harmony.

Just like day needs night.
Just like breath needs stillness.
Just like creation needs both spark and soil.

So if your relationship feels misaligned, pause. Don’t start with fixing them. Start with you.

Ask yourself:
Have I honored my essence?
Am I constantly doing, pushing, striving… when I long to receive, to rest?
Am I numbing myself, floating, avoiding… when I long to lead, to act?

Real love can only thrive when both partners live from their dharma.
When they stop trying to be everything, and start being themselves.

You don’t need to be hard to be strong.
You don’t need to be loud to be powerful.
You just need to be true.

…Let the masculine protect. Let the feminine create.
Let the seed come. Let the womb nurture it.
Let Shiva bring the vision. Let Shakti give it life.

This is not philosophy. This is nature.
This is how love breathes.
This is how relationships thrive.
This is how you come home to yourself.

So today, be the Shiva and Shakti.
Listen to your inner voice, however soft or shaky it may be.
Let it guide you back to your dharma, your truth.
Love without condition.
Give without expectation.
Feel without fear.

Just for once, try.
Try being you, not who you’ve been told to be.
Try loving as the soul, not the role.
And you will see…
The beauty unfolds.
Always. In its own time. In its own way.
But only when we are truly in ours.